Priorities.

Maya Angelou once said, “Never make someone a priority when all you are to them is an option.”  I’ve been seeing that quote absolutely everywhere the past couple of weeks, so I wanted to talk about it.

What does it mean exactly?  Well, if you give too much importance to someone in your life, make sure that you aren’t just an option in theirs.  When something good or bad happens, who’s the first person you think to tell?

Everyone has a person.  I have one, I’m sure you have one.

Now, what happens when the person you tell everything to doesn’t see you as a priority, and instead, they treat you like an option.  Their first choice was busy, so you’re the next runner up, the understudy.  That’s not a good feeling.  In fact, as someone who has personally been someone else’s second choice for a very large portion of my life, I’d equate it to be one of the absolute worst feelings in the world.

So, if someone is making you feel like that, I think you need to say something to them.  Because you aren’t just a toy that they can pick up when they’re bored and leave in the middle of the floor when they’re done.  People will make time for who they want to make time for.  People will text and reply to the people that they want to talk to. 

What brought this on you might ask? 

My honest answer is bad luck. 

This evening, while feeling something like this, I decided to work on a project that I’ve been “working on” for months now, and by working on, I mean I wrote out a half-assed set up and left it to rot in a notebook.  The project that I’m speaking of is a poetry collection, in which I’ve placed a lot of myself.  A lot of feelings like this one here.  A lot of anger, a lot of hatred, a lot of love, and a lot of sorrow.  But the truth is there is so much more to it than that because, it isn’t all bad.

So a reminder to those of us (including me) that sometimes need it:

They’d make time for you if they wanted to.

If they care they’ll show it.

You are allowed to ask for love and support during hard times.

Actions speak louder than words.

If he punches holes in walls, it’s only a matter of time before he stops hitting walls and starts hitting you.

Some people talk to you in their free time, and some people free their time to talk to you.

You are worth it.

You are loved.

You deserve better.  (Even if you think you don’t, you do.)

Don’t make time for people who don’t make time for you.

If someone seriously wants to be a part of your life, they will seriously make an effort to be in it.  No reasons.  No excuses.

Always remember, someone’s effort is a reflection of their interest in you.

You are beautiful.

See it for what it is, not what you want it to be.

You are smart.

Learn to give your absence to those who don’t appreciate your presence.

You are worthy.

You are worth more than second chances and maybes.

Sometimes, we create our own heartbreak through expectation.

Now, go out there, be great, and remember that I love you.

-S.N.L