The year is 2020, and a plague is ravaging the world, as it has been doing since December of 2019. Coronavirus, or Covid-19 has been an ongoing problem since it was named by the World Health Organization in February of this year, although most of the word around me- at least here in my safe little corner of Illinois, didn’t start feeling its horrible effects until March of 2020.
At the time, Covid didn’t mean anything to me because, I was trying to wrap my mind around the very real possibility that my mom wasn’t going to be around forever. But even then, that’s a lie because, all little girls think their moms are going to be around forever. Even when they’re not little anymore, and they’re 25-years old.
So, due to depression, anxiety, my best friend finding herself trapped in the US with me for 6-months, and a whole lot of other crap going on in my life, I dropped out of CampNaNoWriMo before it even began. I didn’t even announce or register my project on the website. I didn’t like my characters. I didn’t have a storyline. Or a plot. Or anything else.
Now here it is October 28th, NaNoWriMo2020 starts in less than 3-days, and I don’t have much more than I did in April and then again in July. I don’t have much more than I did in September when Angel left either. My writing used to be this outlet that I had for myself when times got tough, or I had something to say but I couldn’t say it out loud, something that if and when I did something I was really proud of, I could take it to my mom. Now that I can’t, I’m struggling.
I still post poetry on Facebook, whether it’s on my own page, or my writing page. My latest post “Mama” got comments like “beautiful and sad” and “I feel your pain!” my mom’s old gym teacher from middle school, another incredibly strong woman that I know said that mom was proud of me and I broke down and cried most of the day. These are things that I can’t and wouldn’t tell anyone else. I don’t have anyone else to talk to.
NaNoWriMo2020 starts in less than 3-days, and I have no outline, my characters have decided at the absolute last moment, even though I had originally liked them. At least, I thought I did. If I’m being honest, I was more in love with the idea of them and who they could be, and less with the idea of them.
But you know what I do have? A newfound love of sweet orange tea with honey, and Ritz toasted chips in the veggie flavor. I have a new favorite pen because, before today I didn’t know that they made the Pilot G-2 series gel pen in a 1.0 B O L D tip.
And now, since I will be unavailable to work on my last bit of prep-work tomorrow due to Grandma’s birthday, I’ve sat myself at my desk, got it set up for a night of writing, and I’ll hopefully have some work to show for it later. So for now, I’ve lit one of my favorite bergamot incense, a tealight candle, and my favorite maple syrup candle. I’ve poured myself a drink in my ‘writing goblet’ and also a snack.
So, the countdown begins, and for those of you like me, here’s a reminder.
You still have time to:
- Sign up to the nanowrimo.org website.
- Announce your project.
- Join your local region.
- Find a writing ground
- Strategize for a November win.
- Prove yourself wrong.
- And have a LOT of fun.
Also, now due to a recent announcement from Governor Pritzker and IDPH, counties including both Lake and McHenry are being put back into restriction. Bars, restaurants, gaming cafes, and the like will now be restricted from indoor dining and service, and my work will no longer be allowed to serve snacks and drinks. Our hours are also being limited from 8am-11pm with no exceptions. Which is quite a big change from our usual 6am-12am unless there are people playing in which case it is 1a.m. at the latest aside from Fridays and Saturdays, on which we were able to stay open until 2a.m. at the absolute latest.
Now, I’m not saying that it didn’t suck because sometimes it did. Some nights, midnight would roll around, and the only thing in the world that I wanted was to go home and get some sleep. This is especially true on Saturday nights, knowing that I would need to be back at work by noon the next day. But even though I wanted to go home in that moment, it didn’t mean that I wanted work, and the world to shut back down again like it had in March of this year.
So, while I’m both excited and terrified for NaNo this year, I’m hoping that I can use this time at my desk wisely to bring myself peace. Peace of mine in these times of stress, aggravation, and heartbreak. An escape, something that I’ve been craving unyieldingly, and for no lack of trying, haven’t quite found yet.
So I will raise you one short, chonky port glass full of Sprecher’s Maple Root Beer, and wish you luck upon your journey, as I hope you’ll do the same for me.
Stay Safe, Healthy, & Wicked my friends.
-Sky
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