A tiny puppy, enormous paws, one Professional Service Dingo™ big sister, and the beginning of a Helluva adventure.

Content Note: This post includes gentle discussion of pet loss and grief alongside an indeterminate quantity of puppy chaos, family, new beginnings, and an unreasonable number of nicknames.

Welcome to The Crippled Cryptid.

Disability, chronic illness, service dogs, and survival without the performance.

If you’re new here, hi.

I’m Sky.

Professional cryptid.

Occasional chronic illness and disability advocate.

Survivor of a haunted meat suit with a questionable warranty.

Collector of strange stories, stranger side quests, and apparently…

Dogs.

Very loved dogs.

And this particular story begins with a Potato.

His government name is Blitzø.

The “o” is silent.

Mostly because that’s how it works for the character he was named after.

I know.

Originally, we didn’t think we wanted to name the puppy after a character.

But sometimes life is weird, something sticks, and you go with it.

Especially when the something in question is a split-face brindle puppy who is simultaneously clumsy, enigmatic, and shaped vaguely like a root vegetable.

Also, because we said so.

🥔 Before Blitzø, There Was Potato

Blitzø was born May 28th, one of nine puppies born to two very gentle giants.

His mama is Bailey, a beautiful Great Dane.

His dad is Tzar, an Anatolian Shepherd with just a tiny dash of Kangal thrown into the genetic soup.

Which means Blitzø is currently a very small puppy carrying the blueprints for…

Something considerably less small.

We’ll get there.

When I first met him, though, none of that mattered.

He crawled into my lap.

Curled up.

Went to sleep.

And the first thing that crossed my mind was:

“Aren’t you the sweetest little potato?”

That was it.

Potato.

Before he was officially mine.

Before he came home.

Before Luna became a big sister.

Before we discovered he cries when he’s lonely and accidentally created Binky, Binker, Bink-Bink, Sir Binkerton, and an increasingly unreasonable collection of aliases.

There was Potato.

And somehow…

Potato stuck.

Around here, he may also answer to:

Blitzy.

Itsy Bitzy Blitzy.

Spotty, courtesy ofAunt Lise.

Bitz-Bitz.

Baby Sherpa, courtesy of Aunt Dee.

Little Imp.

Blitzkrieg.

Blitzo, when we feel like acknowledging the allegedly silent O.

Mr. Binkyton.

And, perhaps most importantly…

Luna’s First Cow™.

His name situation is developing almost as quickly as he is.

🐾 This Isn’t Going to Be a Perfect Puppy Highlight Reel

Before we go any further, I think this matters.

Blitzø’s Big Adventure is not going to be a highlight reel of a perfectly raised puppy.

It’s going to be the story of raising this puppy.

There will be victories.

There will be mistakes.

There will be things he learns astonishingly quickly and things he appears to have completely forgotten despite demonstrating knowledge of them approximately seventeen minutes earlier.

There will probably be chewed objects.

There will be weird fears.

There will be training.

Growing.

Learning.

Adjusting.

Figuring each other out.

And almost certainly at least one future household object whose sacrifice will be remembered with honors.

That’s life.

That’s puppyhood.

And if there’s one thing we don’t really do around here…

It’s perform perfection.

So, you’re getting Blitzø as he becomes Blitzø.

One weird little day at a time.

🐾 Making Room for a Potato

Before Blitzø ever came home, we were already making room for him.

We found hand-painted red puppy bowls at Goodwill.

We bought him a gorgeous Rocket Pop collar, blissfully unaware that our new puppy would arrive so tiny it wouldn’t actually fit him yet.

There was a Smashing Pumpkin plush waiting.

A pineapple teether.

Rope toys.

So many rope toys.

Because apparently those are excellent according to Potato.

And once he arrived, a gray three-eyed imp made of Kevlar joined the pile.

Partially because his government name comes from a cartoon imp.

Partially because Kevlar seemed like an excellent life choice for a teething puppy who may eventually possess the jaw dimensions of construction equipment.

And partially because…

That’s just who we are.

When Luna came into our lives and we started learning who she was, she got her own special first toy.

We still have it.

It’s a BarkBox Totoro.

So, the three-eyed imp?

That one is Binky’s.

His.

A tiny artifact from the very beginning of his story.

M&M, meanwhile, remains our household’s official Bandana Curator.

The collection is just…

Smaller now. Puppy-sized.

We know it won’t stay that way for long.

So, we plan to cherish it while it is.

And Blitzø’s first bandana came from someone very special.

His big brother Bear.

Bear is waiting for us across the Rainbow Bridge now, but pieces of him still live everywhere in this house.

In our stories.

In the things he left behind.

And now…

In a tiny bandana worn by a puppy he never got to meet.

Someday, Blitzø may even grow into Bear’s Scooby-Doo bandana.

Considering the Great Dane and Anatolian situation…

I suspect “someday” may arrive alarmingly fast.

🔴 The Red Collar

Blitzø also got his first official collar this week.

Not the Rocket Pop collar.

That beautiful thing is still waiting for his neck to catch up with our ambitions.

Instead, BJ- (the Yard Yeti) and I popped into Petco looking for something that would actually fit our microscopic livestock prototype and emerged with an XS collar and the distinct sensation that they had robbed us of everything except our hopes and dreams.

The collar is red.

Which surprised me.

Because when this began, I thought I would never want to see him in red.

Red belonged to Bear.

For years, that color was his.

And grief does strange things with ordinary objects.

Colors.

Collars.

Bandanas.

Little pieces of a life that suddenly become sacred because someone you loved once occupied them.

But I would be lying if I said red didn’t belong on Blitzø too.

It makes him shine.

Against that brindle coat and that split little face…

It fits.

Maybe another color will fit him better someday as he grows and his coat changes.

I cannot see the future.

There is no crystal ball sitting on my kitchen table, as Aunt Lise would say.

But right now?

Blitzø wears red.

And somehow, instead of taking something away from what red meant before…

It feels like the color learned how to hold another story.

I’m still hunting for his permanent name tag.

Probably Etsy.

I want something handmade.

Something personal.

Your ghoul likes supporting small businesses whenever possible.

Do I know if I’ll use the same person who made Luna’s tag?

Nope.

For all I know, I’m going to stumble across something completely different and immediately yell:

THAT ONE. THAT IS THE POTATO.

I’m trying not to rush it.

Because I’m still getting to know him.

And he’s still becoming himself.

🌙 Meanwhile, Luna Became a Big Sister

Then there’s Luna Bean.

Medical alert service dog.

Professional Service Dingo™.

Keeper of the Boll.

And, apparently…

Big sister.

I knew bringing a puppy home would change Blitzø’s entire world.

What I don’t think I fully understood was that it would change Luna’s too.

And she has been doing so incredibly well.

She plays with him.

She checks on him.

She lets him follow her around while he studies the ancient and complicated customs of Being A Dog.

She shares her world with this tiny brindle creature who appeared one day and immediately decided that everything Big Sister does must obviously be part of the curriculum.

If Luna has a boll?

Blitzø requires knowledge of boll.

If Luna goes somewhere?

Where is she going?

Why?

Should Potato also go?

If Luna is investigating something?

Clearly this is official Service Dingo™ Business and her unpaid intern must supervise.

He watches her.

A lot.

And she is teaching him things we never could in quite the same way.

How dogs communicate.

How to play without turning every interaction into tiny puppy anarchy.

When another dog wants space.

When play is welcome.

When it’s time to settle.

And, naturally…

Boll.

🎾

The sacred art of boll.

Blitzø may still be smol.

The boll may occasionally appear disproportionately large compared with the student.

This has not discouraged the curriculum.

We bought a small army of mini–Outward Hound squeaky tennis balls so both Luna and Blitzø can play.

He chews them.

We throw them.

He chases them.

And he is beginning to learn that sometimes…

You bring the boll BACK.

Revolutionary.

Professor Luna continues her research.

We supervise their interactions, of course, but we also give Luna room to communicate appropriate boundaries when she needs to.

Because she shouldn’t have to surrender every boundary just because there’s a puppy in the house.

She is allowed to say:

That is my ear.

Those are my tags.

Please remove your entire mouth from my person.

In Dog, obviously.

And Blitzø is learning.

Sometimes.

He is still deeply fascinated by her shiny tags.

Her enormous satellite-dish ears remain suspiciously tempting.

There is ongoing research.

But one of the things I’m proudest of is that we’re making sure Luna still gets to be Luna.

She is still my medical alert service dog.

Still my partner.

Still the Professional Service Dingo™.

Still entitled to her own attention, her own toys, her own rest, her own routines, and time that does not involve supervising an ambulatory potato.

Blitzø joining our family didn’t replace her place in it.

It made her world bigger.

And watching her figure out who she is in that bigger world has been one of my favorite parts of bringing him home.

She isn’t perfect.

He isn’t perfect.

We aren’t asking either of them to be.

They’re learning each other.

And somewhere between the games of bitey-face, stolen toys, boundary negotiations, naps, and intensive Boll Studies…

I think something really beautiful is beginning.

Blitzø got a big sister.

And Luna?

Luna got a little brother.

A very little brother.

For now.

Considering his genetics, she should probably enjoy the height advantage while it lasts.

🌱 Things We’ve Learned About Blitzø

The introduction tells you where Blitzø came from.

But it doesn’t really tell you who he is.

Yet.

To be fair…

Neither of us completely knows that yet.

That’s part of the adventure.

But after his first few days home, we’ve begun collecting evidence.

Current findings include:

🐾 He cried so much the first night when we tried the crate that eventually we gave up and let him sleep with us.

This is partially how Binky happened.

A binky is a pacifier.

He was crying.

He wanted comfort.

Binky.

Language is an evolving organism in this house.

🐾 He’s working on learning his name!

Which name?

Excellent question.

Presumably Blitzø.

Statistically, he has several options.

🐾 His current favorite toys are his three-eyed imp, his Christmas lights rope toy, and the mini tennis balls.

🐾 He LOVES rope toys.

🐾 He is an enthusiastic snuggle bug.

🐾 Pup Cup in a Can has received a highly prestigious Potato Seal of Approval™.

🐾 Peanut butter soft training treats are apparently currency.

🐾 Munchee bones take him a while, but he is nothing if not committed to the cause.

🐾 The first time we put him in the grass…

He cried.

For ten minutes.

Grass was apparently unacceptable.

We have since renegotiated diplomatic relations with The Outside.

🐾 He can climb the back wooden steps all by himself.

Going down?

Slowly.

Carefully.

With encouragement.

Gravity is suspicious.

🐾 He got his first nail trim Sunday afternoon!

He cried for approximately one second.

Then survived the terrible injustice.

We were ridiculously proud of him.

🐾 He is getting a Fi collar just like his big sister Luna because we’ve loved having that extra peace of mind with her, especially when life already contains enough things to worry about.

And…

🐾 I am taking an absolutely unreasonable number of photographs.

This surprises no one.

🐾 Blitzø’s Firsts™

Since puppies are basically tiny machines designed to experience approximately nine hundred new things before breakfast, I think we need to keep track.

So welcome to another part of Blitzø’s Big Adventure:

Blitzø’s Firsts™.

This week brought:

🥇 First official collar.

🥇 First nail trim.

🥇 First adventures in grass.

🥇 First attempts at navigating the back steps.

🥇 First official favorite toys.

🥇 First lessons in boll.

🥇 First nights sleeping with his new family.

🥇 First days learning what it means to be home.

Some firsts are enormous.

Some are tiny.

Some involve crying at grass.

We’re keeping all of them.

🥔 Favorite Potato Moment of the Week

This needs to become a permanent part of Blitzø’s Big Adventure.

Because there is no universe where this puppy grows up in this household without producing at least one sentence every week that deserves preservation in the historical record.

This week’s winner happened Sunday evening when M&M opened the refrigerator.

Blitzø wandered over.

Peered inside.

Investigated.

And M&M looked down at him and said:

“Binky, you are not a condiment.”

I wheezed like a tea kettle.

So, congratulations, Potato.

Your first official Favorite Potato Moment of the Week is being informed that you do not belong between the mustard and mayonnaise.

A tremendous beginning.

📸 Favorite Photos of the Week

Because obviously.

I’m documenting the milestones.

But I’m also documenting the ridiculous things.

The sleepy faces.

The weird ears.

The paws.

The toys.

The moments where he looks like he has never experienced a thought in his life.

The moments where he looks suspiciously capable of tax fraud.

All of it.

Because this version of him only exists for a little while.

🐄 The Yard Yeti Has Been Compromised

Then there’s the Yard Yeti.

My little brother.

Provider of elite ear scratchies.

Tummy-rub specialist.

And one of the many humans who took approximately five seconds to become completely ridiculous about this puppy.

As far as the Yard Yeti is concerned, Blitzø is:

Baby.

Tiny Baby.

Precious Tiny Baby.

Please disregard all future photographic evidence suggesting that Tiny Baby has become the approximate dimensions of livestock.

The official ruling will remain:

Baby.

🖤 A Lover, Not a Fighter

One thing I’m already loving about Mr. Binkyton is how curious he is about people.

So far, everyone he meets is interesting.

Potential friend.

Potential provider of pets.

Potential source of Important Information.

No aggression.

No barking at strangers.

No immediate assumption that the world is something he needs to fight.

Just curiosity.

Snuggles.

And an intense desire to be petted.

He is certainly a lover, not a fighter.

Unless you happen to possess something shiny.

My necklace?

Suspicious.

Apple Watch?

Must taste.

BJ’s smartwatch?

Clearly requires scientific investigation.

Luna’s tags?

Fascinating.

His research methodology is unfortunately: mouth.

We are working on peer review.

🐾 And Then There’s Amity

Blitzø didn’t arrive alone in this story.

Remember those nine puppies?

One of his brothers is named Amity.

And Amity is going home with my dad.

That is still one of those sentences that occasionally makes my brain stop.

Because back in March of this year…

I didn’t know this side of my family yet.

Now there’s my dad.

Kim.

My stepbrothers.

My grandfather.

My cousin.

An entire branch of family that somehow went from strangers to part of our everyday lives.

And now?

My dad and I are bringing home brothers from the same litter.

We’re talking about puppy playdates.

Watching them grow up.

Wondering which traits they’ll share.

Probably comparing paws.

And eventually asking each other when, exactly, our puppies became livestock.

Life is strange.

Sometimes your world gets bigger all at once.

Sometimes family finds its way into places you didn’t know were empty.

And sometimes…

It arrives with four paws.

🐾 Why Blitzø’s Big Adventure Exists

That’s why this series exists.

Blitzø is still at the very beginning.

We don’t know exactly how big he’ll get.

What parts of Bailey we’ll see.

What parts of Tzar.

What his personality will become.

What he’ll love.

What he’ll learn.

What adventures those enormous baby paws will eventually carry him toward.

I don’t want to remember only the milestones.

Not just how much he weighs.

Not just which command he learned.

Not just which household object narrowly survived another week.

I want to remember the ordinary things too.

The way his ears looked today.

The toy he carried everywhere.

The weird little habit we didn’t realize would someday disappear.

The things Luna taught him.

The things he taught us.

Who he was…

Before he became who he’s going to be.

Because puppies grow faster than we think they will.

Families do too.

And sometimes, while you’re busy surviving…

Life quietly gets bigger around you.

That’s what Blitzø’s Big Adventure is going to document.

One first.

One lesson.

One growth spurt.

One questionable decision.

One Favorite Potato Moment.

One pile of photographs.

One Big Adventure at a time.

And from now on, every week when there isn’t a Folklore Wednesday…

There will be Blitzø’s Big Adventure.

There will be Potato.

Which, frankly, may qualify as folklore eventually anyway.

👀 Should Blitzø Get His Own Instagram?

Now comes an extremely important question.

Luna has her own Instagram.

Blitzø has…

Approximately 7,000 nicknames.

An increasingly large photographic archive.

His own blog series.

And the kind of face that appears genetically engineered to commit crimes on camera.

So.

Do we make Blitzø his own Instagram?

Because let’s face it…

Blitzø’s Big Adventure has a Helluva ring to it.

Yes.

That pun was intentional.

If you know…

You know.

🎁 Want to Join the Adventure?

We also have a wishlist for anyone who genuinely wants to send something for Blitzø, Luna, or the pack to try.

WISHLIST

There is absolutely no pressure.

Reading?

Supporting.

Commenting?

Supporting.

Sharing?

Supporting.

Coming back next week to find out whether Binky has finally accepted that he is not a condiment?

But if you do decide to send something, we’d love to let the dogs try it, document the chaos, and share our thanks along the way.

Because who doesn’t enjoy watching cute dogs investigate new things?

Especially when one of them conducts approximately 93% of his research with his mouth.

🥔 Potato Stats

Age: Seven-ish weeks and rapidly becoming More Dog.

Current favorite toys: Three-eyed imp, Christmas lights, mini tennis balls.

Current obsession: Whatever Luna is doing.

Currently learning: His name, stairs, boll, and the deeply complicated social contract surrounding household objects that are Not For Puppy Mouth.

Current nickname in heavy rotation: Binky.

Current scientific discovery: Refrigerators contain things.

Current legal classification: Not a condiment.

🌙 Big Sister Report™

Luna Bean: Doing ridiculously well.

Current curriculum: Boll, Appropriate Bitey-Face, Household Navigation, and Introductory Studies in Please Stop Chewing My Ears.

Patience level: Surprisingly high.

Puppy tolerance: Excellent.

Current teaching strategy: Demonstration, communication, occasional Big Sister Look™.

Number of times Blitzø has decided whatever Luna has must automatically be better than the identical thing he already has:

Statistically significant.

🥔 Current Potato Status

Still Potato.

Increasingly Blitzø.

Not a condiment.

Adventure ongoing.

🐾 Until the Next Big Adventure…

And that’s where this week’s adventure ends.

For now.

Because Blitzø is still becoming.

Every day, there’s something new.

A new sound he’s never heard.

A new thing to sniff.

A new lesson from Luna.

A new toy dragged triumphantly across the floor.

A new person becoming part of his world.

A new discovery that probably, statistically speaking, needs to be investigated with his mouth.

He’s learning how to dog.

We’re learning how to Blitzø.

And somewhere in between…

We’re building a life together.

Right now, he’s still our little Potato.

Still small enough to scoop up.

Still growing into the paws that seem to have arrived several business days ahead of the rest of him.

Still learning that boll is sacred.

That the Yard Yeti gives excellent ear scratchies.

That M&M possesses an apparently endless supply of tiny bandanas.

That Luna knows considerably more about being a dog than he does.

And that wherever his people are…

That’s home.

Someday, things will look different.

The Rocket Pop collar that was once too big will become impossibly small.

Those hand-painted red puppy bowls may someday look tiny beside the dog standing over them.

The little bandanas will be packed away.

Maybe Bear’s Scooby-Doo bandana will finally fit.

The toys will change.

The paws will get bigger.

The adventures will too.

Amity will grow alongside him.

Two brothers from a litter of nine, growing up in two homes connected by a family that was only just beginning to find each other right before they were born.

There will be puppy playdates.

Sibling reunions.

First trips.

First mistakes.

Training victories.

Probably some spectacularly questionable decisions.

And more than a few moments when we look at the enormous creature standing in front of us and wonder…

Where the hell did the baby horse come from?

But underneath all of that…

He’ll still be the little puppy who crawled into my lap and fell asleep.

The sweetest little Potato.

That’s why I want to document this.

Not just the milestones.

Not just how much he weighs or what command he learned or which household object narrowly survived another week.

I want to remember the ordinary things too.

The way his ears looked today.

The toy he carried everywhere.

The weird little habit we didn’t realize would disappear.

The things Luna taught him.

The things he taught us.

Who he was…

Before he became who he’s going to be.

If you’re following Blitzø’s Big Adventure with us…

Thank you.

You get to watch him become too.

Maybe someday we’ll look back at these first adventures from beside a fully grown Luna’s First Cow™ and wonder how he was ever this small.

Maybe he’ll still think he fits in my lap.

I hope he does.

If you’re running low on spoons today, there are extras at the snack table.

Take what you need.

Rest if you need to.

Drink some water.

Eat something if you can.

And remember…

You don’t have to be doing something enormous for your life to be an adventure.

Sometimes an adventure is leaving the house.

Sometimes it’s learning something new.

Sometimes it’s meeting family you never expected to find.

Sometimes it’s watching your service dog teach a tiny puppy about boll.

And sometimes…

It crawls into your lap.

Falls asleep.

And changes the shape of your world.

We don’t know exactly how big those paws will get.

We don’t know what kind of dog will grow into them.

We don’t know where those ridiculous legs will eventually carry him.

That’s the thing about a Big Adventure.

You don’t have to know where it ends…

To know it’s already begun.

Welcome to…

🐾🥔 BLITZØ’S BIG ADVENTURE 🥔🐾

The Potato has entered the field.

Until the next Big Adventure…

🖤 Sky
🌙 Luna Bean
🥔 Blitzø

© The Crippled Cryptid
Disability. Honesty. A little chaos.
(And an alarming amount of puppy fur.)

🔗 https://linktr.ee/skylanarissa

No pressure to donate. Reading, sharing, commenting, and coming back for the next adventure all count.

If you want to support the long, unglamorous work of survival, mobility, and building a life big enough for all these paws:

💜 https://www.gofundme.com/f/support-skys-journey-to-health-and-mobility