Flea patrol, pumpkin season, Santa Paws preparations, and one very important service dog with a lot of opinions.

Welcome back to The Crippled Cryptid.

Disability.
Chronic illness.
Service dogs.
Dogs being dogs.
Cats being cats.
And survival without the performance.

If you’re new here…

Hi.

I’m Luna Bean.

Medical Alert Service Dog.
Certified Good Girl.
Professional Mama Supervisor.
Full-time ball goblin.
And, apparently…

Big Sister… times two.

I have a lot of jobs.

Some of them are very serious.

But first, I need to tell you about this week.

🐾 A Week of Fleas, Treats & Questionable Amazon Logistics

Mama says it’s been a slow week.

I say that’s a suspicious way of describing what has been happening around here.

We’ve been dealing with fleas. Apparently, some unwanted little hitchhikers decided our house looked like a lovely place to move into.

They were not invited.

Mama has been doing what Mama does best: organizing, planning, acquiring supplies, and declaring war on anything that makes her babies uncomfortable.

There have been flea combs.
There have been preparations.
There have been some very colorful words directed at Amazon… and the people who brought the fleas.

We’re waiting on our Capstar treatments and a few other supplies, which were apparently supposed to arrive already.

Mama would like everyone to know that overnight and two-day shipping apparently mean something very different to Amazon than they do to her.

And if those packages don’t show up soon, someone is getting a strongly worded customer service message.

I don’t know what that means.

But I suspect it involves barking. Loudly.

Maybe growling.

In the meantime, Mama and Mumther have been making sure everyone is comfortable.

The dogs received approximately two pounds of cookie salad from our favorite place, Reese’s Barkery in McHenry.

Two.

Pounds.

I would like to formally state that this was an excellent decision.

We also got special dinners, and Mama started adding Native Pet Gutwell supplements to our food.

The kitten received a whole collection of goodies from PetSmart, including goat milk food from Reese’s Barkery.

Apparently, everyone is being spoiled.

I approve of this household policy.

There have also been errands, sleeping in, some homemade bouillie that Mama made last night, and enough general household activity to keep everyone occupied without actually doing anything particularly exciting.

Sometimes a quiet week is exactly what a household needs.

Especially when everyone is a little under the weather.

🎃 Halloween With the Pack

Last week was my second Halloween.

And Blitzø’s first!

I was a jester.

My baby brother was a pumpkin.

Naturally, I was the more sophisticated one.

We got to hang out in the room while Mama and Mumther carved pumpkins and handed out candy to the neighborhood children.

There were decorations.
There were people.
There were costumes.
There was excitement.

And, most importantly, there was pumpkin.

Mama cooked some of the pumpkin from our carved pumpkins, and we got to have some with our special dinner.

We also received special cookies.

I would like to recommend Halloween as a holiday.

It has excellent snack potential.

🎄 Santa Paws Is Coming to the Den

Last night, something interesting happened.

Mama and Mumther started painting Santa Paws!

This is going to be a new tradition in our household.

They’re putting together an Advent calendar for us, filled with dog-safe treats.

Since the humans all have one with chocolate in it that we cannot help enjoy.

Now, Mama has opinions about store-bought dog Advent calendars.

Specifically, she doesn’t like a lot of the ingredients in the ones available at regular stores. She prefers knowing what goes into our treats, so she’s making something herself.

Which means we get a whole calendar of surprises.

Twenty-five days of snacks.

I am trying to remain calm about this.

I am failing.

Mama says she’ll show everyone the finished calendar when it’s done.

I think everyone should be very excited.

I certainly am.

🐾 A Little About My Pack

Now, if you’re new around here, I should probably introduce everyone properly.

I’m Luna Bean.

Medical Alert Service Dog.
Certified Good Girl.
Professional Mama Supervisor.
Full-time ball goblin.

I have a lot of jobs.

Some are serious. Some are considerably less serious.

I notice changes in Mama’s body.

Migraines.
Seizures.
Heart rate spikes.
Muscle spasms.
The suspicious little shifts that tell me something isn’t right.

I alert.

I interrupt spirals.

I do Deep Pressure Therapy.

I retrieve things when Mama drops them.

I remind her when her body is being difficult.

And when Mama is being difficult too…

Well.

Sometimes I call for Mumther.

That’s what she’s there for.

Mama says I keep an eye on her.

I think Mama needs supervision.

There is a difference.

She gets stubborn.

She says she’s fine.

Sometimes she’s not.

So, I watch.

I listen.

I wait.

And when necessary…

I make the decision for her.

Because that’s my Mama.

She’s my person.

But my world is bigger than Mama.

There is M&M.

Mama #2.
Treat provider.
Belly rub specialist.
Bandana procurement officer.

In the spring, summer, and fall, she picks out my bandanas.

When the weather gets cold, she finds sweaters for me and my baby brother.

She says we need to stay warm.

I allow this.

Mostly.

Then there is the Yard Yeti.

BJ.

Mama’s little brother.

My best friend.

He throws my ball farther than anybody else.

This is an extremely important qualification.

He says “Lulus!” every time he sees me.

Naturally, I respond with maximum bork.

Maximum boing.

Maximum tail.

This is also the law.

Then there is the orange Jeep.

Mama’s Jeep.

My Jeep.

Okay, technically Mama’s Jeep.

But I am an important passenger.

I like car rides.

I like going places.

I like watching the world happen through the window.

And then…

There is Blitzø.

My baby brother.

My Potato.

My giant spotted little cow.

He is learning.

I am teaching.

Sometimes I wrestle him.

Sometimes I correct him.

Sometimes I let him follow me around the yard.

Sometimes he touches my toys.

Sometimes he touches my ears.

Sometimes…

I need a break.

I am allowed to need a break.

But he’s Pack.

And he’s my baby brother.

So, I suppose…

I’ll keep him.

He has grown on me.

A little.

And now there is Biscuits.

The kitten.

The newest little member of our household.

Apparently, being a big sister wasn’t enough work.

Now I have to supervise a cat, too.

He’s fluffy.

He’s curious.

He likes people.

He also seems to believe that every room in this house belongs to him.

Mama and Mumther are working on making sure everyone gets along safely, which means there are some boundaries and supervised introductions.

I am learning.

He is learning.

And Blitzø is learning that not everything in the house is a chew toy.

This is a complicated household.

I have a lot to manage.

🐈 A Little Purrgatory Update

The kitten has been doing well, according to Mama.

He’s getting spoiled, receiving his own special goodies, and continuing to settle into his new home.

He has his own little kingdom, plenty of toys, and an entire household of people who apparently think he’s adorable.

I am not sure why everyone is so impressed by a creature that makes biscuits with his feet.

I already know how to do that.

Mine just involve actual biscuits.

Mama says he’s a very loved little addition to the Pack.

I suppose I can agree with that.

As long as he remembers that my ball is my ball.

🐾 Luna’s Main Character Energy

Mama says I have “Main Character Energy.”

Whatever the Fluff that means.

She says it a lot.

Usually when I’m doing something important.

Like supervising.

Or chasing my ball.

Or sitting dramatically in the middle of the room because everyone else is clearly doing something wrong.

Sometimes she looks at me with that particular face she gets when she’s thinking about a story.

I know that face.

There are apparently…plans.

Big ones.

Mama says some of them involve me.

She won’t tell me everything.

Which is rude.

But I have learned that when Mama starts saying things like “Someday…” and “I have an idea…”

I should probably pay attention.

Because apparently…

I have Main Character Energy.

Whatever the Fluff that means.

Personally, I think it means I am very important.

Which is correct.

🐾

Most days around here are pretty quiet.

Sometimes we are in Bed Jail™.

Sometimes we’re outside.

Sometimes we’re in the Jeep.

Sometimes I’m working.

Sometimes I’m playing.

And sometimes…

I am throwing the ball for approximately the four hundredth time because apparently nobody else understands that this is my purpose in life.

I am many things.

Service dog.
Big sister.
Daughter.
Adventure dog.
Jeep dog.
Ball goblin.
Snack enthusiast.
Professional Good Girl.

But most importantly…

I am Luna.

And this is my Friday.

Welcome back to the Lunatic Café.

🐾

🌙🐾 Luna’s Closing Notes

That’s all for this week’s takeover.

Thank you for sitting with me for a little while.

I know Mama talks about a lot of things around here.

Her body.
Her writing.
Her adventures.
Her recovery.
Her weird stories.
Her dogs.
Her cat.
Her life.

But I want you to know something.

This isn’t just Mama’s life anymore.

It’s ours.

Mine.

M&M’s.

BJ’s.

Blitzø’s.

Biscuits’.

And yours too, if you’ve been sitting around the Den with us.

I have a job.

It’s an important one.

I watch Mama.

I alert when something is wrong.

I help her when her body stops cooperating.

I make sure she doesn’t wander too far into the dark.

But I also have a life.

I chase my ball.

I ride in the orange Jeep.

I supervise the yard.

I steal warm spots.

I wear the bandanas M&M picks out.

I wear sweaters when it’s cold.

I wrestle my baby brother.

I teach him things.

I tell him when he’s being rude.

I let him know when he’s allowed to follow me.

And sometimes…

I walk away because even Big Sisters need quiet time.

That’s okay too.

I don’t have to be working every second to be important.

Neither do you.

Mama says I remind her of that.

Maybe she’s right.

Maybe that’s part of my job too.

So, if this week was hard…

Rest.

If your body is tired…

Listen to it.

If you need help…

Ask.

If someone offers care…

You don’t have to earn it first.

And if you had a good week?

Tell somebody.

Celebrate it.

Throw the ball.

Eat the snack.

Take the car ride.

Sit in the sunshine.

Do the thing that makes your tail wag.

Life isn’t only about getting through the difficult parts.

Sometimes it’s about noticing the good ones while they’re happening.

And trust me…

I am very good at noticing the good ones.

Especially if the good one involves a tennis ball.

🐾

🐾 Luna’s Official Weekly Report

Mama: Supervised.
Mumther: Fashionably prepared.
BJ: Excellent throwing arm.
Blitzø: Still baby. Still learning. Still mine.
Biscuits: Fluffy. Under observation.
Orange Jeep: Approved.
Ball: Chased.
Snacks: Investigated.
Cuddles: Accepted.
Flea Patrol: Ongoing.
Santa Paws: Under construction.
Work: Completed.
Good Girl Status: Obviously.
Pack: Safe.
Den: Full.
Friday: Successful.

Until next Friday…

I’ll be here.

Watching.
Listening.
Playing.
Working.

And probably asking someone to throw my ball.

Love you.

Now say it back.

🐾 Luna Bean
Medical Alert Service Dog, Big Sister, Ball Goblin & Professional Mama Supervisor

(On behalf of Mama)

© The Crippled Cryptid

Disability. Honesty. A little chaos.
Absolutely dog fur, puppy wrestling, and Luna Bean attitude.

🔗 https://linktr.ee/skylanarissa

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